First impressions (shouldn’t) last

If you’re the kind if person who believes that first impressions last, we probably won’t be friends.
If you met me yesterday, at least, there’d be no chance in hell I’d be getting a Christmas card from you this year.
I was waiting all morning for a highly anticipated phone call from a much wanted (global, fun and exciting) client and the call finally came through while I was in the car.
In the car with our daughter – who was smiling and playing quietly with her bunny when I took a huge gamble and picked up the call on my hands free.
Things quickly flipped out of control because the second I pressed the green button, all hell broke lose in the perfectly tuned acoustic stadium of my car.
Our daughter started screaming. For absolutely no reason at all. In fact, she was smiling as she was screaming like a banshee. I turned around in my seat and made a shhhh sound, like we had been practising at home, and I left my finger for her to hold in the hope she might play with it for a few precious minutes and stay quiet.
Except that she didn’t hold my finger… She leant forward in her seat and BIT IT OFF.
It’s not as if she mistook my finger for a chipolata either. She went full Bear Grylls style and set her Piranha-like fangs onto my unsuspecting bony finger.
Naturally I reacted by screaming ‘(cl)uck’ which was the first thing I said to the Lovely HR lady on the other end of the phone.
I would have LOVED to start the conversation with “Hello, Sally here, How are you? But instead, the first impression the HR lady working for the global fun and exciting client heard from me was “*UCK”.
If this wasn’t bad enough, it was promptly followed by peals of hilarity from the back seat from my sadistic copycat kid who then shouted “cuk’ at the top of her lungs.
“cuk. cuk. cuk”
“cuk. cuk. cuk.”
And then I hung up. And drove really fast to the nearest kebab store. And ate a kebab.
So next time you see a mum with a kid in the street, or car, or playground, looking frazzled.
Don’t judge them.
Even when they look at you, smile and then yell “cuk” in your face.
Give them a second chance. They might just deserve it.

  • Mimi

    At least it was a finger, not a nipple … UCK!

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